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Recovery in the News
A List of Gratitude
William Moyers
The Paramus Post
December 22, 2008
This space usually is reserved for the pain, anguish, fear and anger that people share with me regarding addiction and what to do about it.
But in the spirit of the season, I think it is appropriate to showcase the power of what happens when people find the answer. Gratitude defines their lives.
"Now that I'm in long-term recovery from alcoholism and drug addiction, I have a freedom around the holidays that I never had before," says Jeff Jay of Grosse Pointe Farms, Mich. "I'm not worried about drunk driving, family fights or creditors. Instead, I'm focused on others and how I can bring the spirit of Christmas to them. I'm grateful to be in a position to give, especially to those less fortunate."
Jeff, 53, gives back through his work as an interventionist guiding families to halt their loved ones' self-destructive addictions and to help their loved ones find treatment. He's also an author and advocate who is not afraid to stand up and speak out through his personal experiences. He was addicted for 13 years, found recovery in 1981 and hasn't had a drink or a drug since.
"Recovery has brought me to a life beyond my wildest dreams," Jeff says. "Simple pleasures like putting up Christmas lights, shopping for presents, and welcoming family and friends are unexpected gifts. My family wants to be with me, and I don't even think of avoiding them. What a change!"
Two years ago this week, Danielle Drummond of Rye, N.Y., stood in the emergency room of a suburban New York City hospital as doctors struggled to save her daughter's life. Only 16, the girl's young heart was racing to a finish line with death because of an overdose of Ritalin stolen from the family's medicine cabinet and washed down with vodka. "The doctors did everything they could, but in the end, they said it was nothing short of a miracle she lived," Danielle recalls. "There was a guardian angel in the ER that day. It's that simple."
Her daughter survived and has been clean and sober since. She will graduate from high school in June and hopes to get a college degree to become a counselor at a treatment center. "My daughter's life is the best gift I could ever have, a gift every single day of the year."
Mick Carnett knows his stuff when he says, "Life's too short to drink bad coffee." He's an eclectic-roast master of gourmet coffees and lives in Columbia, S.C. But his frame of reference extends beyond beans, aromas and growing regions.
"I was under the influence of some mood-altering substance every waking moment of 17 consecutive years … a progression from glue to alcohol to pot to intravenous speed and heroin. And then I found cocaine," Mick says. "In all honesty, I believe now that my real drug of choice was MORE … and preferably more of yours."
Now clean and sober for 23 years, Mick still has an addictive personality. He finds the holiday season especially challenging each year.
"Growing up, it was the time of year when the level of intoxication — and the insanity that went along with it — skyrocketed around my house," he says. "So I've learned in recovery that making a 'gratitude list' is what gets me through this time of year, a list of what I have gained in recovery. Today I am truly a rich man — not financially, by any means, but spiritually. I have my health, friends in recovery, and the love of a dear woman who is not just my wife but my very best friend."
This is a season of lists, everything from gift lists to want lists to all the chores to get done before year's end. But take a few minutes to jot down what you're grateful for. It's a priceless gift to give yourself.
William C. Moyers is the vice president of external affairs for the Hazelden Foundation and the author of "Broken," his best-selling memoirs. The paperback edition was released in August 2007. Please send your questions to William Moyers at William@WilliamMoyers.com.