Our Stories
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Our Stories
Susan L. Flowers
After about 26 years of active addiction, I was finally escorted to residential treatment in matching silver bracelets and anklets—otherwise known as handcuffs and shackles—on April 19, 2000. That day was the beginning of a whole new life for me. Just days after my arrival, my father died, and the judge who had furloughed me to treatment, in lieu of jail time, allowed me to do the memorial service for my father in order to allow closure. To make a LONG story short—this event was the precipitating cathartic event in the realization that my father was my first sexual abuser—something I had repressed and, although I had experienced ongoing flashbacks beginning at around age 30, I had refused to accept, or even acknowledge the possibility. I’m a multiple incest and sexual trama survivor, and I had been aware of all of my other perpetrators, but this particular realization set me free. After some serious work with overcoming the Victim Identity, abandonment issues, low self-esteem, and toxic guilt/shame 003, and I’ve dedicated my life to helping the addict who still suffers. I know that recovery works if you live it—and I can’t keep what I have unless I give it away!!! I hope to be able to take part in sharing my FULL story more and more, as perhaps hearing it will give some poor tortured soul a glimmer of hope that help is indeed out there and that they never have to use again! Life is GOOD today for this Dopeless Hopefiend, and Recovery is AWESOME—every day is a gift.
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