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Our Stories
Susan Merrill
Little Neck, NY
Hello, I am recovering prescription drug addict. I have been clean and sober for 22 months. I am 48 married and have a 19 year old daughter. I have learned so much about addiction and about myself in the past 22 months. I now undestand the importance of being clean and never starting to experiment with drugs. When I was using, which was age 20-46, I thought I was on the outside looking in at life and just being different. I still am different but I have incorporated myself back into existence and into some normal life. I am now in a program and trying to find goals and reasons to be alive. I realized that all of my emptiness, fears and sadness is from the fact that my father died when i was five years old and my mother really didn't want a child. I had no one to connect with. I understand now why I had the need to use and why I now have a stronger need not to use. Since my recovery started I have gained a lot of weight, I am now dealing with this. I am working out my sadness and emptiness. I was in a seven day detox program, where I was the only woman, but I realized then that I better pay close attention to what they were teaching. I have learned so much. Thank God I have little or no craving today. I have not used today. I am also very interested in helping other people with addiction problems. I can honestly say I have a broad understanding of why we have become addicts and why we feel the need to be clean. Thank You.
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